MAPS LIE. (Oh wait. No they don't.)

So I have moved. I did it yesterday, with the help of, essentially, my entire family, save for the members who live NOT in New York State. In the approximately 24 hours since I was left alone in my airy and spacious one-bedroom apartment, I have learned a few things about myself.

1) I do not do well without an actual bed. (Mine comes Tuesday.)
2) I do not do well without the internet. (Mine comes Thursday; I am coming to you live from the computer room of the laundry facility of my complex.)
3) I don't know north from south, or possibly a hole in the ground, or possibly a bagel.

Last night I spoke with my dad on the phone when my parents got home, confirming that they had arrived home safely. During this conversation, I told him I planned to go to Target today. Leaping into action, he located, via internet, the Target nearest me, and with our identical maps of the area, we figured out how to get there. At least he did. I figured out how to get somewhere else. Because it is IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO ACCEPT THAT TO GO EAST, ONE DOES NOT NECESSARILY MAKE A RIGHT TURN. I.e., north is not always straight ahead.

Today, however, to go to Target, I took north as straight ahead, and east as right, and proceeded to drive for a REALLY LONG TIME. Then I thought to myself, "wow. Maps lie. This is WAY more than an inch before this turn to the north (or left from my perspective.)"

It's a good thing I brought the map. Because I pulled over and ascertained that there was absolutely NO reason for me to have passed my college along the way. None at all. So I went back in the opposite direction.

And it *was* like an inch. And then there was Target. How about that.